As we head into the week and St Valentine’s day, I just wonder how you are getting on with the 28 days of self love calendar
that I spoke about in last week’s Newsletter. I hope you have been able to find space and time for your own self care, if not every day, at least more often than in the past.
As part of looking at self
love, I want to ask you about value, I don’t mean in a monetary way, I mean how much you value yourself. And as we look at how much we value ourselves, do we give ourself boundaries? When we set out some boundaries for ourself, it can be an empowering gift of self love.
For example we may find ourselves saying Yes to people, saying Yes to situations, when deep inside we actually don’t feel comfortable or we don’t want to do something, go somewhere, be with certain people. Why do we do it and why do we find it so difficult to say No. It often comes from a place of people pleasing. We don’t want to disappoint others, or feel we are letting them down, or it can come from a place of fear, perhaps they won’t like me or want to spend time with me unless I agree with everything, or say yes to everything.
The things we tell ourselves affect our thoughts, our beliefs and our actions, so being clear about what we want to say yes or no to, can be the starting place for setting those boundaries for ourselves. Plus, it's not about pleasing other people but pleasing yourself, and of course there are
going to be certain situations when we have to do something we might not choose to, but generally we do have a choice. Once we start to say No people will then realise that when we do say Yes it's because we genuinely want to be there.
Start to value yourself enough to give yourself some boundaries, and start by choosing to say No … it takes practice, but it will make such a difference to how you think and feel.
Have a great Valentine’s week folks.
With love,
Jane xx
